Beer Battered Baseball

So yesterday evening I partook of one of America's pastimes, baseball. I went with my wife and my two boys, one big - one small. The match up - Sioux City Explorers vs. El Paso Diablos. Being at the game brought back memories of when I used to run, hit, and throw on the field growing up.

Baseball - nothing like it. The anticipation of each pitch grows stronger as the innings go by and the victor is yet to be decided. "Why won't he swing?", "Why did he swing?", "C'mon blue, I can see that from up here (35 rows up, to the back of the batter while I stuff my face full of popcorn and soda!)". Did I mention I have great vision?

Being with the family is always enjoyable, but it seems they don't share my same passion for baseball. Don't get me wrong, they don't mind watching the game, but they just didn't seem that into it. Let me explain: The youngest one falls asleep Top of the 5th, the oldest is facing the crowd about 80% of the time wondering why the batter won't "give" him a foul ball (2 or 3 came within 15 feets of where we were sitting), and my wife (very beautiful BTW) actually took out a book!

But not all was such circumstance. The oldest got sugar high after a Jumbo Cotton Candy and a Sprite to wash it down. I'm sure the popcorn he put into the mix made it that much better. Maybe that's why he couldn't sit still or sit down - you should have seen his eyes - wide open, alert but glossy. 3 words - He loves sugar. Ok, so what about the game.

Diablos got up early 1 run in the bottom of the 1st. Then noone scored for a very long time.

Top of the 5th - Enter the Beer Batter. IF he strikes out, YOU get beer for $1 for the next 10 minutes! Sweet! I don't drink, but it seems that some people have way too much faith in a batter down 0-2 in the count and actually started heading up the isle to line up for hops and barely. He grounded out to second...It got me thinking. So, what if he gets a hit? $10 for the next 1 minute? (I'll post more about how this could potentially yield riches, follow along on my Road to One Million section).

Bottom of the 5th - Half a dozen birds have their way eating senseless bugs blinded by the stadium lights. Good for them!

Top of the 6th - The Explorers score! 1 out, man on 3rd. He swings, fly ball to mid left field. The runner tags, the left fielder puts the ball on the expressway home, a beautiful throw, no bounce, the catcher in position at home just needs to close his glove, "You're Out" the umpire pumps with his fist (I'm sure he thought he would be on ESPN or at least the local news). Getting hosed at homeplate isn't fun, but seeing someone else getting hosed is great!

Bottom of the 9th - 1-1, runner on second 2 outs. Who's up to batter, none other than Mr. Eddy Rodriguez, our knight in shining armor...or not. The Explorers put in the nifty little pitcher. Not much on his heater, but man does he have a nice breaking ball. After the leadoff man got to second (a single and stolen base), he gets K's the other two swinging for the fence trying to hit a ball going down while their bats are going up. Ok, so back to Eddy. He saw his two teammates just faulter right before him. He is prepared and knows about the curve ball.

Pitch 1 - Breaking ball for a strike, no swing
Pitch 2 - Breaking ball for a ball, no attempt to fake a swing
Pitch 3 - Breaking ball for a ball, no attempt to fake a swing
Pitch 4 - Breaking ball for a strike, no swing
Pitch 5 - Breaking ball for a strike, NO SWING! WAAA? Don't tell me he didn't know it was going to be a breaking ball! How can you not swing? Protect the plate! Go down swinging! Fall down, do something!

The crowd was not pleased.

Top of the 10th - Enter Drunk Man dancing with long black haired wig! I don't know the song, but its one of the Macarena types: left, right, count, count, hands, hands...ridiculous. We'll he wasn't really moving too much, but the expression on his face said otherwise. I think he thought we was really moving with his head bobbing and his arms outstretched. Did I mention he was still holding his 96oz beer in one hand and snapping his fingers with the other! Oh if only I had a picture!

Top of 11 - Explorers score 3 runs on some bad relief pitching.

Enter Fireworks. We got home late, a good day.

Lesson: It won't kill you to swing. Really. I've tried. I'm alive.